| Noogies |
02-12-2025 11:54 AM |
Letter From the Great White North
Hi, all.
I was going to take a long vacation from posting in this forum but before I do, I thought I'd let you guys know how things are going just north of y'all.
Not much is new around here. Well, there is this: we hate you now. Seriously. We want bad things to happen to our former best friends. You people elected a mentally ill megalomaniac who is bent on world conquest and appears to want to begin with his Northern neighbor. He said he was going to do it, you elected him and now he's doing it. Promises made, promises kept. We can't see anybody else to blame except the American electorate. You guys brought this on.
And (if you're paying attention), don't take the conciliatory approach of our politicians as the will of the Canadian people. We really don't like you anymore. Personally, I feel particularly slighted. I grew up in the
USA and the experience influenced me bigly(!). I felt aligned with American goals and objectives, American culture and politics to the extent that I really didn't differentiate them fom those of Canada. With this most recent attack from your country, obviously that no
longer goes. I am all on board with cutting off hydro-electric power, strategic minerals, raw materials and all
energy shipments to the United States and will vote for the first politician of any party who suggests any (or preferably all) of these as viable reactions to this unwarranted American attack.
I'm not alone, either. Check the news outside of your own little bubbles. Canadians are now avoiding purchase of American products wherever possible. We are canceling US destination vacations in droves. And it goes beyond that: your illustrious leader has evaporated over a century and a half on mutual interest and goodwill with one stroke of his Sharpie. We are now constantly trying to think of new and interesting ways to fuck you guys up, and American voters are responsible for this unfortunate development, not just those who voted for the current administration, but those whose apathy and inaction made their election a reality.
As mentioned, if you're even listening, don't go by what
you hear from Canadian politicians. It's just polite Canadian window dressing. Trust me, we're pissed. The ill will we bear you is now floating around and we didn’t put it there, but we will act on it. What are we gonna do? Well, to paraphrase an immortal Canadian leader, just watch us.
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