Today has been a difficult emotional day.
 

1. Life failures haunt us all.
2. Sometimes, they exist in physical manifestation.
3. Sometimes, your former in-laws have to put your married life dog down.

And, sometimes, that canine is the last manifestation of a dream that you once had.

This is a public forum. It is not a forum my ex-wife will ever seek out. In fact, as a guess, the only people who will ever seek this out will be (at some level) enemies. Only enemies would ever try this hard.

4. That woman, was a fine wife.
5. That dog (there were two but we're discussing the beagle) was a fine dog.

I don't know what the Hell I am doing, right now.

I do know this: if/when anyone finds this -- for any reason -- and tries to use it against me?

That admission is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Use what against you?

"Oh my GOD, Zeke is HUMAN!":confused:

Dave

Look. Since we're making admissions;

I've never been married, but there are a few fine women in my wake. I was talking to one earlier tonight. The problem is, I've always been a loner. I don't do commitment in a relationship........at all, really. It's me, I'm an ass and I know it. Once they start to get "clingy", or even worse, BOSSY, I push them away. I don't know why, I just do.

I'm told I'm "insensitive and rude". The real me is quiet, most of the time. But, when I'm not........Well, you've all read my posts.

Chances are, when a woman tells you she needs companionship and you tell her to "Get a cat." or "I could replace you with a jar of Vaseline.".....it's over.

Oh, BTW; Sorry to hear about the dog.

Dave

I wonder Dave how you did and do survive in a society where family is the


GREATEST!


Being an elder single or even not married in the States must be pretty similar like being for instance a paedophile? I am single, too.

Pedophile? Was zum Teufel redest du? Ich bin kein Kind Ficker. Sind Sie?:rolleyes:

I come from a large family I have six siblings and lots of nieces, nephews and grand nieces and nephews.

It saddens me to hear of the loss of your dear companion. Let us hope it was to relieve suffering and was done with compassion.


BTW Zeke I too would be hurting if the woman I've know since seventeen and married at nineteen almost forty years ago were to be out of my life. This news coming right after Valentines Day might of made the sting even more painful.

Barney

Ahh Dave you know what I mean - being some sort of "outcast" if one has no own family. That's all.

Zeke my friend, my heart hurts fo you. When our last little dog passed it was tough, we still keep his ashes. When my first marriage failed I wondered if I had screwed up. Then I met Florence or rather Divine Providence put us together in that blizzard. I hope it has someone out there to bind your wounds.

SERIOUS: perhaps I was a bit more lit than I realized, last evening? :)

I was lamenting missing the dog!

It is unusual for me to be overtly emotional but -- completely on accident and without conscious thought -- I drove by my old house last evening.

Nostalgic deja vu was nearly overwhelming about a life long gone.

Fear that someone would "use anything against me?" It's not as high handed deep thought self-righteous as it sounds, I was just embarrassed by what seeing that former home did to me. My instinct in such things is to not acknowledge that such feelings/thoughts occur. What I have found, is that to accept it occurs is a strength, not a weakness.

I am glad to see you growing and acknowledging yourself as a human being. I do not have a PhD in psychology, but have made a lifelong study of cognitive behavioral therapy. From my observations and experiences I believe that not allowing and/or repressing emotions can have some pretty devastating effects, varying from mild depression to sociopathy. I admire your openness in these forums.

Zeke

I'm sorry about your turmoil with the emotions of the past. But I feel the strongest word in our language that I can't master, ha ha ha

Acceptance

With that we can enjoy the past for what it is, a learning experience. The good always outweighs the bad.

I think as we get older we can see the reason for pain. It elevates joy to new heights.

Rough stuff Zeke. I'm sorry about your pain.

Sorry to hear about the dog Zeke. That's a tough one. :(

Overall, I am well. :)

I was just disturbed by the distance from what used to be my life.

Think about it: I drove by where I'd lived for ten years without it registering that I used to live there.

It was..."odd."

Fortunately for me, my memories of "those days" aren't pleasant. I don't register the same feelings.

Maybe that is a sign that you have moved on. Here's to hoping that you continue to move on to experiences that bring happiness.

Regards,

D-Ray

Yes, I am painfully aware of that. People assume you're a homosexual or a pervert of some type. Yes, it is aggravating.

My own mother told me "You're just a bunch of nothing.", not long before she died. But, then again, she had Alzheimer's and even before that she was always saying mean things, so it could have meant anything.

It still hits me hard when I think about it, though.

Dave

Non married people are actually adequate members of the society and even more - serving as a good example concerning many issues - for instance like integrity and tolerance - if they want.

"Be fruitful and multiply" is not the only justification in order to exist. Definitely not.

I hate to sound as if I am delivering a sermon here but this is summat I did learn from life, albeit rather later on. The commandment love thy neighbour as thyself finally registered. You cannot love others if you don't love yourself. I am not speaking of blind love but true love, a love that can see faults but that concentrates on virtues. I am probably my own worst critic but I now recognize that I also do have virtues, that I am worthy of being loved. That also enables me to work on my faults, to erase them or lessen them. In my first marriage we were both too young and in our hearts we, neither of us, really loved ourselves. Some lines from William Congreve can describe such a situation.

“Heaven has no rage, like love to hatred turned,
Nor hell a fury, like a woman scorned.”

Fortunately I have learned that I can truly love myself and because of that can love others.
Offered in a spirit of friendship.

Precious words of wisdom, thank you. Let me add that we decide on our path of life only to a certain extent, the rest is... I don't know...Anyway happiness and contentment lies in letting go and acceptance, according to my experiences.

It has been my experience that every path I choose always leads to another fork in the road eventually. Some sooner, some farther down the path, but inevitably another choice needs to be made.

that is Western Philosophy in one sentence....it was what Hemingway was saying in The Old Man And The Sea....

it is the journey not the destination

Check out the latest Redford flick for an excellent synopsis. Good stuff.

He says few words but one, an unexpected one, made me burst out in spontaneous laughter. It was my life. :)

" When you come to a fork in the road....Take it "

http://www.yogiberra.com/yogi-isms.html

You may not always know where life is going to take you. Back in Feb 1983 when I set out into a blizzard heading for BWI airport (Yeah right, what would be flying in that) and wound up in the lobby of a Holiday Inn. Why did I offer that nervous lady my protection. Why did we write soo many letters. Whatever we were married before the year was out. Was not a fork in the road just the exit ramp.:)

stellar post sir.

Zeke, I hope things look better for you today.