Marriage Equality Has The Right Freaked Out

[donquixote99]

They both look so happy! I gotta say that's OK.

[Tom Joad]

http://www.alternet.org/tea-party-an...-reactions-gay

More crazy shit from the right.

It's pretty entertaining.

“Christians are being taken off the face of the earth,” End Times radio host Rick Wiles warned last week, citing a prophecy that President Barack Obama would begin a “martial law” campaign against religious freedom. (In a moment of epic talking-point singularity, one blog even wondered if Jade Helm, the military training exercise the right believes is a prelude to martial law, will be used to implement the Court’s decision.)

“We are in the Soviet Union now,” conservative radio host Michael Savage intoned on his show this week

“Gays will cheer,” he continued. “As they start throwing pastors in prison, you’ll see who’ll cheer them. Next we’ll get the arena and the lions, get the arena and the lions and bring them in from Tunisia.”

"It is not about the institution of marriage; it is about having the protection, the legal status, it's about using that as a hammer to crush anyone who believes in objective reality,” he said this week to Matt Barber. “This is literally a satanic attack.”

“We can talk about a flag all we want, but the Devil is taking control of this land,” said State Senator Lee Bright of South Carolina, diverting a debate Monday about the Confederate flag to bemoan the Satan-induced fall of American morality on the Senate floor.

“Underneath the left’s golden cobblestones of good will, not far down the road they are taking America, is the left’s utopia — you will come to know it as hell,” WorldNetDaily’s Craige McMillan asserted,

“Underneath the left’s pretty face, it has only ever been about raw, naked power. They view humanity as endlessly malleable and themselves as the sculptor. Having ascended to the levers of statist power from the institutions they first corrupted, they now intend to use that power to reshape men, women and children into their own creation.”
“Only two paths now lie ahead,” he concluded. “Repentance or destruction.”

Or resistance. “There’s a coming a day, I believe, that many Christians personally and churches corporately will need to practice civil disobedience on this issue.”

Such was the warning of Jack Graham, Prestonwood Baptist Church preacher, just one week before the Supreme Court ruled on same-sex marriage. Graham said that 16 million Baptists were “prepared to go to jail” if the ruling went against them.

“In the Spirit of Daniel the prophet and MLK the reverend, we Christians must now engage, as relates our peaceful response to the imposition of counterfeit same-sex ‘marriage,’ in widespread civil disobedience,” Barber wrote, one of many attempts to hitch Martin Luther King, Jr. to the cause. “It’s the right thing to do. In fact, it’s a sin if we don’t.”

“As many in the early church refused to bow a knee to Caesar in worship, so, too, will many modern Christians refuse, under any circumstances, to obey any court opinion or man-made law that presumes to make sin obligatory.”

See right-wing blogger Sylvia Thompson, who warned that civil disobedience was the only thing stopping the fascistic rise of gay Nazism.

“It is a given that the pernicious court system aided by a lawless Obama administration will act viciously toward opposing Christians, with a force matching that of Hitler’s Nazi regime,” she wrote last week.

“More and more Americans will be persecuted, prosecuted, and imprisoned as this Court ruling goes into effect…[and] eventually the persecuted will stop accepting lawless court rulings that result in their bankruptcy and Naziesque brainwashing sessions (‘sensitivity training’) that are punishment for noncompliance with evil…All of America will then grasp what homofascism truly means, as the Germans eventually grasped what Nazism meant.”

Who’s gonna run with this lump of genius? Whitewater Crossing Christian Church senior paster David Vaughn, that’s who. After all, if men can marry men now, why can’t he marry bacon?!?

“My wife has suspected it for quite some time,” he wrote. “My family has accepted it. I hope you do too. In fact, I demand it, so don’t criticize me or be intolerant. That would be ‘ham’aphobic. This doesn’t hurt ‘non-bacon’ marriages in any way, and I’ve been reading all kinds of scientific journals that tell me it won’t hurt my children (bacon bits) either since they will be in a home of love.”

“The definition of Marriage has evolved like society, and I am so glad that now my sizzling union is protected by the Constitution, and promoted by my president. I may even flirt some with my new bride’s sister — turkey-bacon. I’m going to go hog wild.”

[catswiththum]

If I was young and single, I might marry bacon - hard to beat good bacon.

[Tom Joad]

Originally Posted by catswiththum

If I was young and single, I might marry bacon - hard to beat good bacon.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjR0AYf4pSM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HrIeP798hiQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sk499poi4Q

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXhJPey3i_A

[donquixote99]

My fave: "...believes in objective reality ... literally a satanic attack.”

[catswiththum]

I just want to know where they find the time to sit around and dream this sh*t up. Do they not have yards to mow, other work to do, stuff around the house to fix?

Are there not enough real problems? We have to invent satanic bacon?

[catswiththum]

I kind of like "hamophobic" and "bacon bits," though.

He could name his children Canadian, Smoked, and Apple Cured.

[donquixote99]

Comedy is a relief...there's something funny about all these guys, but mostly not ha-ha funny.

[merrylander]

Funny thing is that sex is decided at conception (Chromosomes) but genitalia are common to both sexes until around the 5th month when they begin to assume the appropriate shape. So who is to say the one's preference in mates might not have gone in the "right" direction during this process?

[hillbilly]

Originally Posted by merrylander

Funny thing is that sex is decided at conception (Chromosomes) but genitalia are common to both sexes until around the 5th month when they begin to assume the appropriate shape. So who is to say the one's preference in mates might not have gone in the "right" direction during this process?

As a kid, dealing with large herds of livestock I used to see farm animals on occasion that had both sex organs. So I guess humans gender can go either way, or both too. Really there are humans born with both, just we hardly ''hear about it.'' I can see that being hard for someone to talk about.